World Views

Okay, so here I am, on a Tuesday evening, haven't had school all day, met up with a cute girl earlier, and now I'm just home from Thai food with the room mates, and wearing a freshly washed onesie, seems like a good time to write a post. In the last couple days I've done a few things I thought I might blog about: Made sushi for the first time, renovated my beer pong table and baked some 100% whole wheat bread. Unfortunately almost all of those failed, or at least didn't turn out the way I imagined. Although people seemed to still enjoy the bread when they were here Friday.

Anyway, I am instead going to start part one of a three piece series on various theories, world views and/or philosophies that I am currently working on over time. Some people may have read some of it before, because I've posted bits in other places, and I don't know if they all tie together or anything, or if they one day will, but maybe that's because I haven't had input from my legions of readers yet. Anyway, my first post in this series is going to talk about my issues with the idea of "being yourself".

The phrase 'be yourself' has always kind of bothered me. I understand the heart of the message and I respect what it's trying to say. I've even always thought  this quote was wonderful:

“To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.”
-e.e. cummings

But I feel like a lot of people also misinterpret the heart of this idea. Things like 'Born This Way' by Lady GaGa take a good message and change it into an excuse to act however you want, whenever you want, and it seems to me that THAT is the message getting through to far too many people. In light of this, I would like to suggest a different idea, one that is equally easy to misinterpret, but I like regardless. I think we should all 'Be Everyone Else'.

This is somewhat a two part idea, that I can hopefully unpack in a way that says what I'm trying to say. But before I even get into it I want to point out that I'm not trying to advocate blending into the masses or giving up any part of your own uniqueness! Hopefully it will all make sense when I've explained.

The first part of this may not intuitively seem to tie in to the 'Be Everyone Else' slogan, but I promise it will! It's basically my model for self improvement and decision making, which I've done for a while now, and I like to think works pretty well. What I propose is that we should all have, in our heads at all times, an idea of the type of person we wish to be. Not just a vague picture, but specifics, like what moral code you wish you could adopt, or what hobby you want to do, or even just how you wish you interacted with strangers through-out the day. If we each have this image in our head, than rather than listening to our own bias when making decisions, we can just ask 'What would the person I want to be do here?' I admit it's still not a perfect solution, but I think it has potential.

The second part of this idea is where it all comes together. It's basically my method for creating this person we have in our heads. This is where we take from absolutely everyone we ever cross paths with. I firmly believe that, in every single person there is at LEAST one trait that it worthy of admiration. Even the most unpleasant person has something in themselves that you could be better off if you had. So when building this perfect self in your mind, find the traits and qualities you aspire to in the people you interact with everyday. Actively seek the traits these people have that are wonderful and beautiful and add them to the ever improving goal you've set. This way we're not only improving ourselves, but our interactions. Imagine a world where, instead of just assuming the worst in people, we are actively seeking out the best in them? And think about how they'd start to act towards you?

It's also important to not constrain yourself to the real world. We can find these traits in books, movies, TV shows, or wherever. I wish I had Westley's unstoppable drive to fight for his true love just as much as I wish I thought to offer my seat on the bus more often. There's no limit to the sources you can pick from or the traits you can aspire to, so just go crazy!

I'd like to challenge each person that reads this to at least give it a try. Spend a day next week developing your 'perfect self'. Or next time you catch yourself thinking how unpleasant someone is, try and pick at least one thing they have that you admire. And let people know! Tell them how wonderful they are! Point out their admirable traits, and let them know its something you're going to try to emulate. This may not solve all your problems, or make us all into saints, but I honestly believe it's worth a try, so get out there and Be Everybody Else!

So, that's part one. I hope it was a worthwhile read, and at the very least gave you something to think about. I won't reveal too much about part two, but I realize now it should've been part one, because it's less in depth than this idea, and parts one and two are supposed to lead up somewhat to part three, which is my more complete world view. But I already wrote this! So it's part one. Part two will be about "The Unified Self" (it amuses me to try and come up with fancy or legitimate sounding names for these things). So, you know, tune in tomorrow for part 2.


From my Keyboard to your Monitor,
Jeff